It was published a year before I died, dimwit.
Come on, Hughie, we all know you believe it anyway. Get a load of it:
At this point, dear reader, let me concede one shocking truth. Some young women actually anticipate the wedding night ordeal with curiosity and pleasure! Beware such an attitude! A selfish and sensual husband can easily take advantage of such a bride. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: GIVE LITTLE, GIVE SELDOM, AND ABOVE ALL, GIVE GRUDGINGLY. Otherwise what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust.
That’s instructions for the bride, you idiot!
Well, you act like a blushing virginal Victorian bride anyway, so I’m not surprised - anyway! Another section! I will prove that you are a prude, Hughie!
Once the bride has donned her gown and turned off all the lights, she should lie quietly upon the bed and await her groom. When he comes groping into the room she should make no sound to guide him in her direction, lest he take this as a sign of encouragement. She should let him grope in the dark. There is always the hope that he will stumble and incur some slight injury which she can use as an excuse to deny him sexual access.
Look at that! I swear Hughie, you would use that excuse if you could! See, the Victorians were so prudish that they insisted that a proper marriage would have both parties clad in sleepwear - that means no nakedness!
S-shut up! And they have a point - it’s vile -
We know you’d never top at this rate. Ooh, this is a great one…
One heartening factor for which the wife can be grateful is the fact that the husband’s home, school, church, and social environment have been working together all through his life to instill in him a deep sense of guilt in regards to his sexual feelings, so that he comes to the marriage couch apologetically and filled with shame, already half cowed and subdued. The wise wife seizes upon this advantage and relentlessly pursues her goal first to limit, later to annihilate completely her husband’s desire for sexual expression.
That right there is proof why Mr. Hugh needs to get laid.
Love you too, Hughie.